Running With Scissors

The delivery from Mars contained two hammers and a pair of scissors. It was ages before scientists discovered that these were infected with living organisms that fed on the material of the instrument and turned themselves into a living replica, adding limbs if necessary. One living instrument touching a regular one was enough to spread the contagion.

Soon, the research institute was up to its ears in implements running around on tiny stick-like legs, playing pranks on humans and giggling when they succeeded. A hammer jumping from the top of a door shouting ‘Geronimo!’ became a common sight.

Any instrument used to try and kill them was integrated. Flame-throwers were tried, but the sprinklers had to be turned on after a few test-tubes ran around turning their stored fire onto curtains.

Finally, a napalm strike was ordered and the building destroyed. But a three-foot Elvis doll from one of the researchers’ cabin fled the institute, pretending to be a midget. Its hobbies include dancing in godowns and taking stray table-lamps in its arms and singing them ‘Are You Lonesome Tonight?’.